Saturday, November 29, 2008
?!?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!!!!????????????????????!!!!!!!!!
ouch?
im thinking abt the who, the whens, the whys, and 1 corinthians 13:5.
ive yet to rationalise it, and this is major stink.
i realise i may never ever come to a conclusion.
and i question myself alot, wondering if i'll ever be fine with that, sometimes even wondering, if God's love is sufficient to last.
and yeah. i believe it to be so. i trust that He will not fail, and i don't need top-ups from people.
if that's the way it's gonna be, im fine by it, heartbreaking it may be, because i know exactly who would be there to catch me when i fall. perhaps it was too much to have hoped tt you would have been there too.
stupid to have hoped that you would bother to provide additional support. stupid.
i blogged @
8:27 AM
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
(to the tune of "12 days of christmas")
on the 24th november, my true love gave to me,
1 yummy cake,
covered with superb hazelnut cream
HAHA no lah.. not my bday. tt was us in the lift up to shir's house. supposedly to "surprise" the november babies, as we do every year. tradition much?
tts b4 entering the lift. we were at the staircase near sha's house
somebardy was feeling hungry
more ppl feeling hungry
... shir looks intimidated by jas + papaya's awesome candleblowing skills. jo worst! she backed off so much that her face got cut off?!
arm chio arm chio until so happy.
dont ask me why they were holding hands.
dont ask me why they look so happy too.
btw, tt black mass on the right, was actually sotongball's head. heeehh.
you guessed it. sotongs arnt white anymore. they evolved to become black.
.. ok dont mind me. im blabbering as usual
on the way to sunplaza's cavana for dinner. shir's treat!
yea. she's STILL as generous as ever lah!!!
the focus isnt on the GROUP, but rather, on the SUPERBLY AWKWARD POSE of SOMEBARDY.
hiahiahiakakakkakaaas
again, dun ask me what that SOMEBARDY was doing man!
haha sorry lah jo..dun say i shoot u lah. but u ALWAYS allow circumstances tt gives ppl a reason to shoot you lah! hehhhh
OH OH.. and
.................
yanni that was for you.
:D
(shir pls dont kill me. PLEASE!!)
i blogged @
9:35 PM
ive been spending the past few days going out, and going out, and going out..... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
buts its ok.. i super miss, and super love meeting up w people. i cherish time even more now..after i allowed the As to eat up the past 2 years. wahahahahahhaa :D
ps. yy, we're waiting for your liberation from the army. then we can go celebrate our freedom! :D
i blogged @
9:30 AM
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
there's a reason why informants were hated so much during world war 2.
significantly, they contribute to assault in the most brutal.
haha no, this isnt history-101
Labels: jaded
i blogged @
10:13 AM
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=77151589As long as we're here - Kristy StarlingWhy do we have to fight?
Why can't spend our time trying?
I wanna be close to you
Keep love from slipping through my hands
words said in anger
aimed at someone
Are hard to take back once the damage is done
Let's stop now
As long as we're here
alive on this earth
I'm gonna love you
for all that it's worth
And one of these days
we're gonna take off and fly
Let's make the most of of our time
As long as we're here
Some people live their lives
Holding their fears inside them
Afraid to build windows
To let the light of the world in
They hide in the darkness of self-imposed walls
If they could just tear them down
they'd have it all
As long as we're here
alive on this earth
I'm gonna love you for all that it's worth
And one of these days
we're gonna take off and fly
Let's make the most of of our time
As long as we're here
When you're with me
I breathe easy
You are my need
right now love me
i blogged @
8:41 AM
i didnt say anything. those justifications were meaningless.
i posted it to find out 2 things.
i got what i sought to find out.
i blogged @
7:52 AM
Monday, November 17, 2008
time spent with you means lots to me. haha the more i stare at your pic, the more i think you look dumb! wahahaha. rmb arh. you're mine after the As. i'll drag you to Guardian again and i WILL ASK for help to find.... IT :D
i blogged @
2:34 PM
"God, why did you soften my heart if that only makes me even more susceptible to hurt?"
why? so that i'd be able to learn to forgive.
i thought i would be fine with a hardened heart as i once possessed years ago, thought i would be able to block out whatever emotion i didnt wanna feel. for a minute there, i fell. but thinking back, i know i thought wrong. haha. those days were crap, i nvr wanna return.
if my heart were as cold as steel, how then, would i ever expect to
learn to LOVE,
experience unspeakable JOY,
possess unfathomable PEACE,
be taught PATIENCE,
be showered with KINDNESS,
be exposed to GOODNESS,
know FAITHFULNESS,
be humbled by GENTLENESS,
or exercise SELF-CONTROL?
Galatians 5:22-23 was His instantaneous reply in response to my qn.
my heart has been softened, that i may have LIFE by the Spirit.
He wants us to experience a full range of emotions, both joy AND sadness, just as He designed us to. We're molded in His image. God feels too. there's no need, then, to numb ourselves, because good or bad, He'd still be there every step of the way, and tts more than enough for me.
i blogged @
1:56 PM
Sunday, November 16, 2008
ever heard of respecting your child's privacy?
i'll be frank. i am angry, i am disappointed. VERY disappointed.
i am not stupid, you know? i know what you have been doing behind my back, i know exactly what you've been prying through. this has dragged for SO long, still i didnt say anything because i was waiting for your conscience to kick in. but no! you didnt care!
and i know you feel guilty. otherwise you wouldnt have bothered hiding my stuff or switching pages. YES, i saw.
i NEED my privacy. i NEED an outlet to vent when i dont want to go pouring my heart out to another human being, or i would EXPLODE. how would YOU feel if i plowed thru ur brain? because that's exactly how i feel right now.
oh, i even rmb telling you SPECIFICALLY, how DISGUSTED i was with ppl close to YOU, NOT ME, knowing more abt me than i would feel comfortable to. and still, here you are, doing what i told u i didnt like! which is exactly why im so upset! wow.
so i'll leave this post here, for you to read when you decide to be a selfish kpo out to satisfy your kpo-ness instead of placing my SANITY above that. when you use the com in future, i'll make sure to close the door. when you use ur notebook, i'll be sure not to disrupt you. and when i bathe, i'll rmb to leave my journal in even clearer view on my table for you to read too. yeah? sounds good?
you have violated ANY ounce of trust i even had in you, and i find it near impossible to trust you again. rmb when you told me u trusted me? well, i'd gladly forsake that "trust", if you resorted to scrutinising my THOUGHTS via my journals and my blog in order to be able to "trust" me. this is the reason why i no longer desire a proper conversation with you.
oh btw, there's this parenting magazine on the dining table... i believe it belongs to you? take a good read at page17, paragraph 2.
it says something about making sure not to read your child's blog if ur child doesnt want it? and reasons justifying why it is so harmful. yes, "harmful" is the word.
i blogged @
7:14 PM
Friday, November 14, 2008
i am seething.
congratulations.
i value a certain degree of privacy, and you've SUCCESSFULLY crossed the line. AGAIN! better yet, you've left me with NOWHERE to hide. AGAIN! yea, thanks to YOU, mr, im a converted hermit. wow. BRAVO. no less from a scholar of Joker Academy. a standing ovation for you man, you deserve one.
ever considered attending a courtesy campagin? why not? you SHOULD start supporting the cause for lifelong learning. u could start by learning exactly WHERE your boundaries lie, and to have the prudence to STAY IN. those are THE basic lifeskills that you SERIOUSLY LACK. hello?!?!?!! what happened to the code of conduct?! what happened to RESPECT, huh? what, your kindergarten teacher's teachings slipped from your memory? never heard of aretha franklin's signature hit? eh brother, you werent born yesterday, neither was i.
haha. unoe what? i DREAD the next time i wld have to see you again. which, judging by ur habits, shouldnt be too long a wait. but hey! guess what! this converted hermit will make it a POINT, to avoid seeing YOUR FACE at ALL costs (oh look, there goes my freedom AGAIN). and SHOULD i allow such an UNFORTUNATE situation to arise, mark my words, or so help me, i WILL give you the coldest stare i can ever muster. apparently ive failed miserably in getting the message across thus far.
tell me, did you intend for me to feel this way? did you? huh?
crap. this is what.. the epitome of ridicule?
what, an eyesore.
i would DEFINITELY classify you as an "unlovable" that max lucado talked about. reading it is one thing, application is another. i admit, this is where i fall short.
for now, i KNOW i need to cool off, because i dun rmb being this irascible for a VERY, very long time.
ARRGGHH
hdsophaayopetyroatwspdohiwjasglkdvcxnld
i blogged @
4:41 PM
Sunday, November 02, 2008
thank you nerina pallot !!!!!
your songs, are THE ideal chill-out, de-stress songs man!
so long world... im plunging into the abyss of isolation. oh ho ho
ps. pray for me!!!!!!! much much MUCH appreciated :D
i blogged @
12:10 AM
... shir looks intimidated by jas + papaya's awesome candleblowing skills. jo worst! she backed off so much that her face got cut off?!