Monday, April 30, 2007
koped frm kitty
...
finally, a short breather before e multitude of tests soon to come AGAIN
will they EVER give us 1 wk free of tests?
hmph
=(
..
finally sat dwn n had a gd talk wiv jo ytd
instantly felt nostalgic
oh mans i totally miss her lahs
havn seen her in ages
miss e times when we used to crap like nobody's business
miss e times she sat bside me in class n sang so many songs like nobody's business
i still rmb our hilarious duets at e back of e class
she's 1 of e few hu understands me
i was so darn happy when she went to church..
hold on babe!
.
so glad so glad..
poured my heart out to Jesus
all e crap ive been keeping inside of me
feeling so free
=)
i blogged @
5:05 PM
Saturday, April 28, 2007
our household may not be filled wiv violence like e 1 upstairs,
not wiv intelligence like e 1 dwnstairs,
but neither issit filled wiv love
alright, i'll bet u deny it
but its a fact...i dun feel it
y not?
u expect me to run right to e door everytime u return home juz to greet u like i did 10 yrs ago
but u dismiss e possibility tt i din hear u come home
u bent on ur stand tt its becos i think u dun exist
u expect me to talk out my probs wiv u
u wonder y i dun
but i really want to ma,
dun u understand?
i barely see u
u come home even later than me
at times, i come home when u n dad r fast asleep
ive nvr had a gd talk wiv u b4
i still rmb back when i was 7
whenever u came home, i was overjoyed
'finally! someone to talk to!'
i must have gotten used to tis solitude
alright, so u may ask
y dun i talk to u now?
i dun trust u
how cld i?
i want to but i cant
when i hear of friends telling me how much dey love deir mum
when i see dem stare in shock tt i dun talk my probs out wiv mine
u have no idea how much it hurts
when i get blamed for amabel's faults,
u hav no idea how much it hurts
when all i hear is ur sarcasm
u hav no idea how much it hurts
i used to run out of e house for a breather
cry my heart out
vent my frustrations
i hated it, i really did
hated this house
even u n everybody else at home
i wasnt alone, but i was
things turned arnd last november..
i found hope again
i stopped quarelling wiv u ever since
but no.....i still cant bring myself to talk to u
but tts e truth
inoe u get angry wiv me alot for not talking at home
inoe im a total introvert at home..
but ma,
i really hope u wld understand
i have lived nearly 17 yrs like this
Christ says we hav to honour our parents
im really trying to but i nd time
time to restore our r/ship
time to love my sisters
time to come out of tis ridiculous shell ive gotten so used to
i blogged @
11:20 AM
Thursday, April 26, 2007
a bud may be ugly, but it'll definately bloom. dun despair
e sun may set, but will definately rise again. dun despair
how many times has HE said those 2 words to me?
dun despair.
how many times hav i forgotten?
dun despair
=)
.
had an econs test today..
wows.. when CTG 113 says "LETS FAIL TGT", we MEAN "LETS FAIL TGT"
some answers we gave:
..
Q: As a consultant to London Mayor Ken Livingstone, discuss 2 factors tt wld contribute to e success of a road pricing scheme [7m]
A 1: If e mayor of london doesnt know, how would I know?!?!
A 2: (loads of criticism of e mayor of london)
A3: this is my answer: I DUNNO
...
GO 113!! lets make VICTOR puke while trying to mark our scripts
MUAHAHAKZ
..
i feel so much stronger..
yea..God intends tt life's trials shd make me better, not bitter
U are my umbrella in e rain ^^
thought cell might not understand, at least they try to..n tts gd enuf for me
at least ive got God hu understands, n tts gd enuf for me
=)
i blogged @
7:29 PM
Sunday, April 22, 2007
ever felt so helpless when u cant do a single qn in ur tutorials tt u actually cry outta exasperation?
i blogged @
9:48 PM
focus on the love of Jesus
focus on the love of Jesus
focus on the love of Jesus
focus on the love of Jesus
focus on the love of Jesus
focus on the love of Jesus
focus on the love of Jesus
focus on the love of Jesus
focus on the love of Jesus
focus on the love of Jesus
yes i can yes i can
i blogged @
6:25 PM
Friday, April 20, 2007
the sea of galilee
..
it was here tt Jesus met simon peter james n john.
it was here where Jesus performed many miracles
it was here tt they left it all to follow Jesus
-----------------------------------------------------------------
e mmt i reached home, it was straight to bed..
was oh so tired..
n i had a nightmare
the same 1 i had b4, but worst
it was a saturday..
had to go back to sch..
of all ppl, i only saw apple, hj & teckhan...
i left after awhile to hurry to church...
tts when e horror started
---
e mmt i stepped out of e amphitheatre, i was standing in a mall..
shocked, i stepped outside to be greeted by a busy expressway
vehicles were roaring past me at top speed
safety precautions all forsaken..
it was as though they were racing
i hurried back into e busy mall n dwn e escalator to e basement, hoping tt e amphitheatre i was studying in wld come back into sight
but no....it led to e mrt
it was a station i had nvr heard b4..
weird name it had-VOMITING
i tried to go back up frm where i came frm...
but no...it was as tho a vortex was sucking me towards e nxt escalator n e nxt...
e excalators were like monsters..
moving so quickly i almost fell
there was nth for me to grip..n i was amazed at how e others were standing so firmly
no idea how far i was underground..i'll bet it was deeper than douby ghout mrt
e trains were coming at such frequency...
amazed at how fast dey were moving
all i cld c were ppl rushing to n fro..
not so much as a glance frm any of those tie-clad goons
such was my state of panic at tis foreign surrounding, i really wanted to cry...
God, God was all i cld think abt
in my prev dream, a bus appeared to take me home, but no...nth here but speed
---
was jolted right outta e dream
cold sweat n everything..
i could still taste e fear n hear e roaring
couldnt think sensibly at all
WHAT was it?
.
thank God im back into reality now...
was tt how singapore's gonna be like in e future?
i dun like it..
.
pd's end-time sermons is currently running thru my head right now
i blogged @
6:15 PM
Monday, April 16, 2007
i was reminded by my qt last night + kairi
we're bringing glory to God by using our abilities.
God gave us feelings..
to feel is a gift..thk God for it
heard this song..
He reminded me...
all i nd is Him
not e approval of others
my actions shld be done to glorify
not for approbation
=)
i blogged @
7:04 PM
mr ng told me today tt mum & dad complained to him abt me
they thot tt i was too much of an introvert
hmms..
it really saddened me, tho i din show it..
i feel tt my attitude at home has changed le
ive stopped quarelling
juz nd time for me to talk to dem now..
such intimate r/ships nd to b nurtured frm young
if ur parents do not talk to u as a child,
i seriously doubt u can talk to dem now
i think its kindda unfair to assume tt its my responsibility to initiate talks
i think its a 2-way thing
ive tried talking abt my life, but everytime i do, it seems as tho ure not bothering..
different frequency
its juz sad lahs...
u guys dun even sense tt ive stopped quarelling
u say i act as tho my family doesnt exist
i think i could say e same abt e way u treat me
u act as tho im some delinquent
nth i do will satisfy u
overcome by lassitude..
Lord,
its my prayer tt u teach me to love n accept others
help me to forgive those hu hav hurt me b4
i wanna glorify ur name
i wanna bring a smile to u
lord, i pray tt ur peace tt transcends all understanding will be wiv me
in jesus' most precious name,
amen
*sorry yanni..i told u i wld write abt wat i read in PDL...but..*
And all my eyes wanna see is a glimpse of youi think i cry easily now
i blogged @
5:51 PM
Friday, April 13, 2007
koped frm yaneh's blog
i seriously hate being judged by ppl hu dun hav e slightest right to judge me
i dun get it lahswats wrong wiv me liking to be me?
u shld change tis u shld change tt
hello? my appearance was crafted by GOD
wat right do u hav to tell me to change it?
wats wrong wiv yjc?
so u managed to get into sa
big lah huh! u were once frm a "neighbourhood" sch as well
arghs
=(
aniways..
shermaine n i had a real fun time singing praises to HIM e whole of today..
ahahakz she pretended to b e guitarist
her n her spiky hair n manly shoulders n arms...hahahakz
aniways aniways, was reading abit of "the purpose driven life" by rick warren last night..i loved e msg revealed to me..
Life on earth is juz a temporary assignment
"..but we are citizens of heaven, where the Lord Jesus Christ lives. Real believers understand tt there is far more to life than juz e few yrs we live on tis planet."
we're Christ's ambassadors
u will nvr feel completely satisfied on earth, bcos u were made for more.
happy mmts here are nth compared wiv wat God has planned for uure time on earth is not e complete story of ur life.u must wait until heaven for e rest of e chapters.
it takes faith to live on earth as a foreigner
never focus on temporary crowns
in order to keep us frm becoming too attached to earth, God allows us to feel a significant amt of discontent n dissatisfaction in life-longings tt will NVR b fulfilled on dis side of eternity,
we're not completely happy here coz we're not supposed to be!
earth is not our final home. we were created for smth much better
when life gets tough, when ure overwhelmed wiv doubt, or when u wonder if living for Christ is worth e effort, rmb tt ure not home yet. At death, u wont leave home-ull GO home
[2 corinthians 4:18]
"we fix our eyes not on wat is seen, but on wat is unseen. for wat is seen is temporary, but wat is unseen is eternal."
=)
i blogged @
10:57 PM
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
busy busy busy..
i think im drowning!
haiz haiz...
tis has been a wk of constantly trying to maintain my cool & keep my head
yup..its STRESSFUL
im tired=(
but i chose tis path
no pt regretting
yes...i must push on
n not lose my focus on God
i must stick to my commitment!
i must rmb tt i can find rest in God
ahx..wat a challenge
i blogged @
10:09 PM
Friday, April 06, 2007
dear Jesus,
i pray tt u help me to love my family
its juz so difficult
teach me love,
give me hope & peace.
help me to stand up each day n face all life has got to offer me
forgive me for sinning against u
forgive me for constantly breaking ur heart
i try, but temptation hovers around
i pray tt u help me overcome them
i pray for victory over them
remove my fear n gimme courage
thank you for constantly encouraging me
help me to be more like u n less like me
i wanna die to myself each day
Lord, guide my everyday step by step
i trust u n i wanna follow u
i dun wanna live e way ive lived animore
in jesus' most precious name i pray,
amen
i blogged @
2:00 PM
Thursday, April 05, 2007
i nd a squash racquet
got a whole load of tests nxt wk
AHHHHHHH crap... im doomed
mwahahakz..
temper temper...
im so prone to getting pissed nowadays
God help me
teach me to love them
to love them like Jesus..
i blogged @
8:12 PM
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
tests.hmk.
unreasonable econs tutor.
frustration?
sneers.smirks.
judgemental glances.
who's stupidity?
quietness.emo.
alter ego.
what's happening?
what's done is done
regrets?
whats e point
i blogged @
7:39 PM
koped frm kitty
a bud may be ugly, but it'll definately bloom. dun despair
the sea of galilee
koped frm yaneh's blog